Why Marinette Needs A Lock on Her Door
by RicardianScholar Clark-Weasley
Summary: Alya and Nino walk into on the blindfolded Marichat trope and immediately assume the worst. Adrien and Marinette's attempt to explain only make things worse and Plagg is absolutely no help whatsoever. Neither is Tiki really.


When Alya asked Nino if they could invite Marinette to join them on their date in the cinema Nino had no problems with it.

Well, he had some.

But he'd be a rubbish boyfriend if he said ' _no babe, don't try to cheer your best friend, who has been acting weird the last few weeks, up because I wanna make out with you in the back of the cinema_ ' and so he just nodded in agreement, told Alya he was cool with it, and got a kiss on his cheek for being so awesome.

They entered the Dupain-Cheng bakery and were greeted warmly by Marinette's parents before they directed them upstairs. Alya hurried forwards leaving Nino to rush after her (not that he was complaining he had a great view) to catch up as they ran up two flights of stairs and climbed up a ladder before Alya flung open Marinette's trapdoor.

"Hey Marinette," she called out cheerfully as she clambered into Marinette's room eagerly. "The new superhero movie is out do you want – WHAT THE HELL?!" she cut herself off with a scream. " _Oh my God_!"

Nino, who had the disadvantage of being behind Alya, immediately walked into her back, staggered backwards, and when he moved to adjust his hat that had almost fallen off caught full sight of what made Alya halt to a stop and scream.

He couldn't really see Marinette but he could see her pink denim legs wrapped round a shirtless, blonde, boy's waist and her pale arms stuck out from beneath the boy's arms as her tiny hands dug into his shoulder blades. The blatant sight of one of his best friend in a compromising position with a currently mysterious shirtless dude caused his jaw to drop wide open.

" _Jesus_!"

The blonde boy jerked back and turned to reveal that he was _Adrien_ of all people! This only made Nino's jaw drop even further to the floor (if that was possible) while Alya let out a wordless shriek of surprise.

" _Alya?_!" Marinette cried out as she sat up. Nino immediately fumbled to pull his hat over his eyes as he realised that she too was shirtless but before he did he also caught sight that she was blindfolded. Seriously, _**what the hell**_?! " _Nino?_!" Marinette gasped. "It's not what it looks like!"

"Really?" Alya said sceptically. "because it bloody well looks like you and Adrien are going at it Fifty Shades of Gray style or are you doing to tell me that a shirtless Adrien tripped and landed tongue first on you casually blindfolded self?"

"Wait, _what?_! Nino peeked from beneath his hat and was relieved to find Marinette had covered herself with Adrien's white shirt as she fumbled to take off her blindfold. As soon as she did her blue eyes widened comically as her mouth made a little 'O' of surprise. "ADRIEN?!" she screeched.

"Erm…." Adrien shifted sheepishly as he avoided Marinette's eye. "I can explain?" he offered hopelessly.

"Well!" Alya crossed her arms huffily. "When you said you were over Adrien I didn't think you meant you got _your leg over him_!"

Marinette blushed a deep pink at that. " _Mpfl!_ " she squeaked out incoherently at that.

Nino blinked as he took in Marinette's stunned, flustered, state and then he glanced over to Adrien who looked a little guilty but mostly desperate as he tried forlornly to meet her gaze. It clicked immediately at that moment that Marinette had no idea who the hell she had been snogging mere seconds ago.

"You didn't know you were kissing Adrien…." He voiced out slowly. He then shook his head and shot Adrien a look mixed with amazement and disgust. " _Dude_!"

"I can explain!" Adrien wailed.

There was a long drawn out silence as Alya began to tap her foot impatiently, Marinette actually put on the shirt she was clutching to her chest (not that it seemed to sink in at all in Marinette's mind that she was putting on Adrien's shirt as she hastily, sloppily, buttoned it up), and all three of them stared at Adrien expectantly.

Adrien, however, remained utterly silent as a look of frantic desperation crossed his face.

Alya's patience ran out as she suddenly flung her arms up in the air. " _Well_?!" she demanded rudely.

"I…we….that is…erm….met online?"

Another beat of silence and another click of realisation hit Nino. " _You two go on a sex sites?_!" he yelped crossly.

Adrien spluttered at that while Marinette squeaked again. " _What?!"_ they both cried out. " **NO!** "

"It was an ordinary chat site!" Marinette said frantically as she waved her hands wildly. "About…about…about video games! Yeah! _Video games_! No sex! No weird hook-up websites were used! We just talked normally!"

"Oh yeah because a normal chat site with normal conversation always leads to blindfolds and nudity!" Alya said snarkily. Marinette wilted slightly and instantly Alya softened (she could never stay mad at Marinette for long which was totally unfair if you ask Nino because she can stay mad at _him_ forever). "Okay," she said a little more calmly, "say you didn't meet on some weird sex site that doesn't change the fact that there's no way in hell that a conversation of kinky hijinks _**didn't**_ come up."

" _Meep!"_ Marinette squeaked as she covered her mouth "It wasn't like that!" she wailed. "It wasn't kinky!"

"Yeah!" Adrien agreed. "It wasn't kinky."

" _Dude_!" Nino cried out exasperated. "There were _blindfolds!_ And one of you didn't know who the other was."

"Exactly!" Alya nodded. "And not to mention the whole sneaking into the bedroom thing unless you're telling me that Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng _know_ that Adrien is up here."

There was a deafening silence as Marinette and Adrien both ducked to look down at Marinette's pink bedspread.

"I thought as much," Alya said with great satisfaction, "and when we're alone girl I am _so_ going to give you a lecture of a lifetime about letting strange men you met online sneaking into your bedroom."

"He wouldn't have hurt me!" Marinette protested. "It was _Adrien_!"

" _But you didn't know that_!" Alya shouted. "If you want to have some weird fetish thing about not knowing who you do things to that's your business but you at least make sure you're _safe_ and someone knows what's going on."

"Yeah, Marinette," Nino agreed, "That's basic online relationship 101. You never meet someone you met online without telling someone else."

" _It wasn't like that_!"

"Yes it was!" Alya snapped irritably. "Unless," she added slyly, "you're telling me that there is something else you're not telling me?"

"We met online!" Marinette said quickly.

"Yeah!" Adrien agreed just as hastily. "Online, wasn't ready to really let her know who I was but really wanted to meet her."

"Nothing weird about that!"

"Nope! No weirdness," Adrien babbled, "nothing kinky or anything to do with fetishes just two people that met online and wanted to meet."

You didn't have to be a genius to know that Marinette and Adrien were blatantly lying at this point.

"Yeah…." Nino dragged as he narrowed his eyes suspiciously, "somehow we don't believe you."

"Look," Alya said nonsensically, "we're not judging you, well, yes, we are," she admitted without shame, "but only because you would be so stupid to meet someone you met online like that without telling someone!" Marinette looked down at her hands shamefully while Adrien scratched the back of his neck sheepishly as he offered an apologetic smile. "I just want to get this straight in my head, you two are either the kinkiest, stupidest, people ever or there's another explanation that for some reason you don't want to tell us. _Well_?" she demanded when neither Marinette nor Adrien answered immediately. "Which is it?"

Adrien caught Marinette's eye finally and widened his pleadingly as he mouthed something to her. Marinette shot him a weak, reassuring, smile back before she reached out and took his hand. There is a moment of silence before they nodded in agreement and turned back to Nino and Alya.

"….we're stupid and kinky," they both confessed reluctantly.

Adrien and Marinette both looked shame-faced as they turned a bright red. Nino was all too willing to drop the subject (because he really didn't want to know) and Alya looked satisfied having gotten to the bottom of it…

…right up until they heard a loud, deep, cackle that came from somewhere up above them.

" _Plagg_!" a sweet but stern voice cried out from somewhere. " _Shh_! They can hear you!"

Adrien's jaw dropped as he turned his half fearful, half shocked, face to stare at Marinette who looked utterly horrified with wide eyes and a deep crimson blush. Alya, however, firmly set her hands on her hips as the investigatory journalist gleam returned in her eyes.

Nino sighed.

This was going to be a _long_ night.


End file.
